Make America Funk Again: New Orleans and Beyond

After our whirlwind day in Washington, we charted course for New Orleans! These few days were our first in a while without a gig, so we stopped in Columbus, Bloomington, and Nashville along the way, visiting some old friends and making some new ones. It was a welcome break that allowed us to relax and enjoy the trip. We eventually made it down to New Orleans, which ended up being one of the highlights of the tour!  We spent about a week in the Big Easy, during which time we funked and down the French Quarter, stuffed our faces with beignets at Cafe Du Monde, and played four different shows at Rare Form, Lucky's Bar and Grill, Howlin' Wolf, and a house-warming party for our friends generous hosts who put up with us for six days. Oh, and we carried out several well deserved pizza slaps. What is a pizza slap, you ask? It's a time honored Porky's tradition! When someone loses a bet, that person is slapped in the face with a piece of Little Caesar's pizza.  Examples can be found on the Porky's facebook!  

After an absolutely amazing few days in NOLA, we now have a little Porky's family down south (oops)!

Overall, the tour was a huge success.  We met so many new friends and had so many amazing experiences, and owe more thank you's than we can shake a stick at. This tour would not have been possible without the friends and families that fed us, housed us, and put up with our shenanigans as we made our way across the country talking about the issues no other campaign is talking about.  We also want to extend our sincerest and snout-felt gratitude to every person who came out to see us along the way.  Without your dancing, funkitude, and electoral support, we would just be a bunch of weird, sweaty dudes. Instead, we're running for president with our name on the ballot in no states! We love each and every one of you!



Make America Funk Again: Washington, D.C.

After a long night of funking in New Jersey, we set out in order to get to Washington D.C. early in the morning.  Why, you might ask?  We had an appointment to meet with our local congressman, Reid Ribble!  We had contacted his office in order to share our platform with him and discuss his possible endorsement of our candidacy; needless to say, our meeting was a success!  To our surprise, Congressman Ribble has some experience in the music industry, as the former owner of a Christian rock record label in Nashville for nine years (who knew)! 

As you may have guessed, he was happy to meet with us and gave a full-throated endorsement of our campaign (as evidenced by this tweet)! After a few restful naps, we played a show that night at the local Treehouse Lounge.  The show went very well and we were lucky enough to have a few friends from home stop by! Our time in D.C. was incredible, providing the necessary springboard for our campaign to reach the HNFL ('Hole 'Nother FUNKY Level).

Make America Funk Again: NYC & Hoboken, NJ

After an amazing few days in Ithaca, we headed to the Big Apple!  We braved the drive into New York City to play a gig at The Shrine, one of Harlem's most eclectic spots just down the street from storied venues like the Apollo and the Cotton Club.  The night included some amazing local bands, including our friends Dreamt!  We were lucky enough to have a group of friends from our alma mater (Lawrence University) make it down to the show, including part-time Porky vocalist Kati Abdul, who joined us for a couple of songs. 

After funking our faces off, we celebrated Ilan's birthday by downing Jaeger bombs and making fools of ourselves on the dance floor. We spent the next night at Finnegan's Bar in Hoboken, NJ where the atmosphere was filled with the electricity of so many funky people getting down all night long. With the help of our hosts (the lovely Edelman family), we made many new friends and found a second home out east.  

Make America Funk Again: Ithaca

After some R&R, we continued on to Ithaca, met up with fellow Porkys Matt "Hotdogtrombone" Lowe and Eli "Eli" Edelman, and played shows at Casita Del Polaris and The Dock. We were lucky enough to hear and share the stage with the Fall Creek Brass Band, led by the hotdogtrombone himself (we also saw them play the night before with a CrAzY brass band from Providence, RI called What Cheer Brigade!). After so much activity, we spent a day at Steve Merwin and Inshik Lee's amazing barn where we funked, ate some brats, and jammed with a lot of new, amazing friends before capping off a wonderful Fourth of July weekend the next day at hotdogtrombone's house with his family.

Make America Funk Again: Ann Arbor

The second leg of our campaign started with a town hall meeting Ann Arbor, Michigan.  However, a only a few hours into the trip, our campaign encountered its first scandal: a brick right in the middle of the road, which left one of the Pork van's rear tires completely shredded. With the help of a tow truck and one of Portage, MI's finest, we made our way to a local Pep Boys to replace the tire. Our deepest thanks to Officer Lafey who generously helped transport four Porky's in his squad car.  An hour later, after successfully navigating Tire-Gate, we were able to make it to Ann Arbor's Vail Co-op, where we had an incredible night playing withTear Soup and Scissor Now, who played one song in particular that we felt an extra special connection to.


Make America Funk Tour: Minneapolis/Duluth


Our campaign started on June 15th at The Amsterdam in St. Paul, Minnesota. We then headed north to Duluth, where apart from playing our set, we spent the night drinking beet infused gin at the Red Herring Lounge.  For those of you wondering what beet gin tasted like, imagine what a beet tastes like, then imagine what gin tastes like, and put those together. We ended the first leg of our tour with a truly funky night at Whiskey Junction in Minneapolis, where we shared the stage with local groovesters Sons of Groove. Before we left the Land of Ten Thousand Lakes and one hundred butter sculptures, we spent some time writing and recording the first of a new batch of policy planks ("songs") that would be the basis for our presidential campaign. Those new positions can be found HERE!  After a few days of hard work, we headed back to our respective homes for a few days before setting out to meet our fellow Porksters on the East Coast for another round of campaigning. 

We know what we need to be successful on the road.

Make America Funk Again: Porky’s Hits the Campaign Trail

We here at Porky’s Groove Machine had noticed the discontent throughout the nation with our current presidential candidates.  For many, the decision between the two nominees is a tough one to make, as the two party system does not effectively represent the entire country.  This is why Porky’s Groove Machine decided to declare its candidacy for President(s?) of the United States. Our policy plans are unmatched (and unacknowledged) by any other candidate in providing numerous funky benefits to all Americans.   

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With Porky’s as president, every citizen will have access to single payer brunch, syncopation, and general funkiness. Our foreign policy, the "Porky's Doctrine" (alternatively known as  as “Pass the Peace”), will extend grooviness to all nations in need . Our infrastructure plan will put millions back to work replacing unattractive medians throughout the nation with shag carpeting, which, in turn, will create opportunities for related industries, like lava lamp and groovy chair manufacturers.  We will never back away from the tough issues like sex ed, which we will address with a program we call “Don’t be Silly (Wrap your Willy)."

Unlike our opposition, we want to unite the nation by bringing together those who believe in both getting up and getting down. So, with our fresh policy plans, our goal to Make America Funk Again, and our new T-shirts, we set out on a national campaign (tour) to make our case to the only group that matters: the American people! 10-4! 

Tiny Desk Contest 2016

We here at Porky's Groove Machine have been watching the Tiny Desk Series for years now and the incredible variety of musicians to grace Bob's desk with their performances has been a huge inspiration to us. With the 2016 Tiny Desk Contest upon us we felt it was time to show Bob and his team how we felt and that we have reached a musical maturity befitting NPR's offices. In deciding to enter the contest we realized we are currently living in 8 cities, in 7 states, on 2 planets! We hope you enjoy listening to this rendition of Puberty as much as we enjoyed performing it.

Greetings Funktopians!

Welcome to Planet Funk, the new home of Porky's Groove Machine!

Check out videos of our "Magic Brunch" recording session, the audio result of that work as well as our debut EP, "This Would Be A Great Present For My Grandma," our calendar, a history of the band as written by drunk Nick Allen four years ago, and a number of ways to connect with the band.

Also, keep your eyes peeled here and on Facebook for news of our tour in June-July. We will be playing shows in Minneapolis, Madison, Milwaukee, Chicago, Ann Arbor, and possibly more, and we are insanely excited. We have a few shows in Appleton and Steven's Point if you just can't wait so check out the calendar

The best way to stay in touch and hear all the news is to sign up for our newsletter.

Thank you all for checking out, supporting, dancing to, singing along with, and jamming with the Groove Machine. Funk on!